[Air-l] Re: email destroying friendships?

radhika gajjala radhika at cyberdiva.org
Sat Apr 26 18:58:05 PDT 2003

Except maybe for the element of speed in interaction - couldnt the same 
thing be said of letters?

I remember a time in my life where my sarcasm in letter-writing did quite 
as much damage...


At 09:14 PM 4/26/2003 -0500, you wrote:
> >--The permanence or relatively long-lasting imprinting of words can
> >sometimes affect people more deeply than words uttered in passing.
>While I dislike anything that priviledges f2f contact over electronic, I
>do have to agree with this, especially since email means different
>things to different users. I've known people who compulsively save every
>communication they receive. This can lead to problems when an email
>written in the heat of a moment comes back to haunt the writer a few
>weeks later when calm has been restored (I tend to act as though
>anything I put out on the net in any form can always come back at me
>later). Similarly, a political discussion gone bad in person can perhaps
>fade from memory more readily than an email which can be saved and
>reread over and over.
>Something I keep thinking when I read studies about CMC in relationships
>(or in any arena) is that the studies aren't long-term, at least not
>yet. I believe that long term studies of use of CMC in relationships
>would end up yielding results that match up fairly well with f2f
>relationships. While email and chat and so forth can make communication
>easier to do/require less physical effort, the technology itself does
>not maintain a relationship. No matter what form you use to communicate
>with another person, you both have to work to keep it going. :)
>"The right use of language, respect for it, care and attention in
>engaging in it, implies - demands, makes real - morality, and ethics.
>The right use of language leads to respect, care and attention for
>others. Language is a moral activity."
>Air-l mailing list
>Air-l at aoir.org

Radhika Gajjala


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