[Air-l] Re: email destroying friendships?

stuszyn at bgnet.bgsu.edu stuszyn at bgnet.bgsu.edu
Sat Apr 26 19:14:37 PDT 2003


>--The permanence or relatively long-lasting imprinting of words can 
>sometimes affect people more deeply than words uttered in passing. 

While I dislike anything that priviledges f2f contact over electronic, I 
do have to agree with this, especially since email means different 
things to different users. I've known people who compulsively save every 
communication they receive. This can lead to problems when an email 
written in the heat of a moment comes back to haunt the writer a few 
weeks later when calm has been restored (I tend to act as though 
anything I put out on the net in any form can always come back at me 
later). Similarly, a political discussion gone bad in person can perhaps 
fade from memory more readily than an email which can be saved and 
reread over and over.

Something I keep thinking when I read studies about CMC in relationships 
(or in any arena) is that the studies aren't long-term, at least not 
yet. I believe that long term studies of use of CMC in relationships 
would end up yielding results that match up fairly well with f2f 
relationships. While email and chat and so forth can make communication 
easier to do/require less physical effort, the technology itself does 
not maintain a relationship. No matter what form you use to communicate 
with another person, you both have to work to keep it going. :)

ST


"The right use of language, respect for it, care and attention in 
engaging in it, implies - demands, makes real - morality, and ethics. 
The right use of language leads to respect, care and attention for 
others. Language is a moral activity." 






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