[Assam] What a shame! YOUR Qs ANSWERED IN CAPS

[Chan Mahanta]

Hi Momy:

Thanks for your response. I am delighted to see a 
young Oxomiya woman holding her ground and 
providing leadership and courage to others like 
Jyoti Das and Nayan Medhi  for example in a forum 
such as assamnet. That is MY kind of an Oxomiya; 
courageous, proud and willing to take a stand for 
what she believes in :-). So all powers to you 
Momy.


Having said that, I think it is important to 
point out out what was wrong about the OPINIONS 
that you delivered in your farewell note/s:

*** First off, your disappointments about 
assamnetters and assamnet were indeed rooted on 
an unexpressed assumption that it is a forum 
which ought to discuss
only projects and issues such as what you hold 
dear, to the exclusion of issues that others 
might find more interesting. No doubt yours and 
others' like yourself who expressed such 
sentiments are GOOD and laudable issues/projects.
But it does not mean, in any way shape or form, 
that other issues could not or should not be 
pursued at the same time.

*** It is not a secret that yours, Jyoti's, 
Nayan's , Rajib's and a lot many others' angst in 
assamnet is rooted in your disagreements with the 
political viewpoints of those such as yours 
truly. You, just like anybody else here, are 
entitled to your views. But it would have been 
better if you could express that forthrightly, 
instead of finding other reasons to vent your 
frustrations. That is what I alluded to as the 
"Urohi gosor wr onyo korbaat", which roughly 
translated means that the real root of the 
disappointments are different from what was 
presented as.

*** Your assumptions about the 'older generation' 
of expatriate Oxomiyas as a self-centered lot, 
unwilling to help others is a rather shallow and 
ignorant one. It is a typically unenviable 
Indian/Kharkhowa trait of making broad brush
judgements about a whole class of people based on scanty sampling.

*** What *I* do or have done, either as charity 
or as public service, is MY business. I don't 
need anybody's approval or judgement about its 
adequacy. Besides, it is neither about ME, nor 
you, nor Rini Kakati, whom you have singled out 
as a villain :-). That is why I shall not speak 
about it here.

*** It is also true that as laudable as charitable efforts are, they are merely
outlets for salving one's guilt, and are 
inadequate vehicles for improving Assam's lot.

Personally I have no need to resort to charitable 
efforts to soothe my feelings of guilt. The 
burden of my guilt is far less than most I know. 
But I have nothing against those who do.

*** I do have a right to use the words I do to 
characterize opinions of others, including 
'naive', just as you do. But I use words 
judiciously and carefully, and only when I can 
back them up.

If you would like to know why I used the word 
naive, let me know, I will be pleased to explain 
:-).

>NOT TRYING TO PROVE ANYTHING.

*** Not true. The haughtiness with which you 
dismissed assamnet, and thus its many 
participants, was a poor display of your own 
self-importance and self-image. While you are 
entitled to it, others don't need to accept it 
without a word :-).

>I won't go into details now(YOU ARE ALWAYS 
>WELCOME IF YOU WANT TO), but if you >would like 
>for me to, I will be pleased to take them up for 
>discussion at a >later time.(WHY PRIVATE..IT 
>STARTED IN A PUBLIC FORUM, KEEP IT THAT WAY)>

*** I don't get into private debates about public issues.


>(TALK AND TALK AND TALK SO THAT BY THE TIME I AM 
>OF YOUR AGE, I WILL SHARE MY >OPINION WITH A 
>YOUNGER MEMBER IN THE EXACT SAME WAY AS YOU HAVE 
>DONE).

*** Discussions/debates and action are not 
mutually exclusive of each other. Both can happen 
at the same time. Assamnet is NOT an action 
group, never has been, never will be. So if you 
came here with the expectation that it will be a 
platform for launching ACTIONS, while entirely 
possible ( I have personally led such efforts in 
the past and more than once), is not at all a 
given and not a realistic expectation. That *I* 
have learnt from my nearly 12 years in assamnet. 
But the difference between you and I is that I 
did NOT leave in a huff, because I could not 
interest others in what I consider worthwhile or 
important. When I failed, it was due to my 
inability to communicate and persuade. And when 
we succeeded ( yes we did too) it was because 
others did participate and contribute.

That is what I and Ram too attempted to point out 
to you, but unsuccessfully. No doubt because you 
already knew everything you needed to :-) about 
assamnet.


>WELL THAN POINT ME TOWARDS THE RIGHT DIRECTION, 
>DONT ASK ME TO ARGUE, DEBATE >AND DISCUSS)

*** It is not my place to teach someone like you 
Momy.I was merely attempting to point out what 
was missing from your assessments and verdicts. I 
do however serve as a teacher to those who learn 
from what I point out, just as all  those others 
from whom *I* have learnt so much over a decade 
and more.

In fact I can, without any hesitation 
what-so-ever, declare that I have learnt MORE 
about Assam (and India  too) from this forum than 
anywhere else in my entire life, in-spite of the 
fact that I grew up in what is essentially 
Assam's heartland. And I know I am the better for 
it.

Assamnet is, without a doubt, the most important 
forum for Assam and the Oxomiya identity that has 
developed in this IT age. And the credit for it 
goes to Prof. Jugal Kalita,Prof. Deep Medhi and 
the people who contribute to its existence and 
expansion thru their participation.


>AND AM NOT AT THE LEAST INTERESTED IN  ALL YOUR 
>OPINIONS ABOUT ME ( ESP. MR >MAHANTA)..

***  But the opinions that *I* have expressed 
are a RESULT of the opinions that you expressed 
and implied Momy.  I do not go about finding ways 
to express opinions of others in this net or 
anywhere else. But I do speak out when I find 
reasons to take issue with others'.


Another long one here. Nice to have spoken to 
you. Wish you the best on all your efforts, 
personal as well as societal.


cm








At 4:19 PM +0100 10/12/06, Momy Saikia wrote:
>Hi Momy (HELLO MR MAHANTA):
>
>
>I was disappointed to read your note on the disappointments of your
>own (YOU SHOULD BE AND EVERYONE ELSE BECAUSE YOU 
>COULDN'T APPRAISE AN YOUTH'S OPINION).
>
>Allow me to share a little observation of mine, with the hope that
>you will take a moment of your precious time to 
>ponder(I ALWAYS HAVE TIME FOR ANY CONSTRUCTIVE 
>CRITICISM AS ITS ONE OF THE REASONS BEHIND MY 
>DEVELOPMENT):
>Expectations is the mother of all 
>disappointments!" (WELL IF YOU ASK 
>ME...EXPECTATION IS THE MOTHER OF 
>ACHIEVEMENT)..... Is it catchy or
>what? (ITS DEGRADING THE TERM FOR ME SO NOT 
>CATCHY AT ALL SIR)  Remember you heard it here 
>first :-)( I NEVER HEARD OF IT AND EVEN IF I 
>DID, I WOULDN'T MAKE SENSE OF IT BECAUSE THESE 
>PROVERBS ARE OUTCOME OF SOMEONE'S EXPERIENCE NOT 
>MINE).
>>
>>
>>The point is that you had expectations of 
>>assamnetters (NEVER DID, THATS YOUR 
>>PRESSUMPTION); does not matter if they are 
>>realistic, meaningful, useful, or otherwise(ANY 
>>INTELLIGENT BEING WOULD AGREE THAT TAKING AN 
>>ACTION TO HELP SOMEONE ISN'T UNREALISTIC, NON 
>>MEANINGFULL OR USELESS). And since those were 
>>not met (TRUE), you are leaving the forum 
>>(LEAVING THE FORUM BECAUSE, I WOULD RATHER 
>>INVEST TIME IN ACTIONS THAN DISCUSSIONS WHICH 
>>LEADS ME NOWHERE BUT RESULTS IN RESENTMENT 
>>TOWARDS DIFFERENT PEOPLE OR GOVT IN THE END), 
>>in a huff (WELLCOME TO THE 21st CENTURY, IF YOU 
>>NEED SOMETHING DONE THAN DO IT NOW),
>waving your own virtues(CAUSE I BELIEVE IN THEM 
>UNLIKE MOST OF YOU), imagined or real(ABSOLUTELY 
>REAL AND SO I AM ABLE TO PUT THEM INTO ACTIONS),
>for others to see and go (ACTUALLY TO IRK MINDS 
>LIKE YOU...THE POSITIVE OUTCOME OF MY MAIL IS 
>THAT SOME PEOPLE HAVE MAILED ME IN PERSON 
>OFFERING HELP TO BUILD A SITE...BUT YOU AGAIN 
>TOOK TIME TO WRITE ME A PAGE FULL OF YOUR 
>OPINION ABOUT ME AND WANTING A DEBATE OUT OF IT) 
>( --Wow! What a young lady of action she is 
>(SURE I AM, ELSE I WOULDN'T HAVE THE CONFIDENCE 
>TO POINT AT THE "WORDS ONLY" GROUP).
>>
>>
>>But I understand ( I SERIOUSLY HOPE YOU DO). 
>>Most do(AGAIN I CAN HOPE THAT THEY DO). We have 
>>seen them all here (THIS COULD ONLY MEAN TO ME 
>>THAT YOU HAVE BEEN POSTING YOUR OPINIONS ON 
>>THIS SITE SINCE IT FIRST STARTED). Good news 
>>(NOT REALLY CAUSE YOU ARE WASTING YOUR TIME)
>>however is that you are young (JUST 25, LOT OF 
>>EXPECTATIONS YET), and hopefully still open to 
>>learning (I WOULDN'T BE DEVELOPING IF I WASNT 
>>OPEN TO LEARNING)
>>new tricks unlike some old us old dogs (DONOT 
>>EVER HUMILIATE YOURSELF...NO ONE CALLS YOU THAT 
>>, I AM SURE) . And it is NOT a beauty contest 
>>(I DO UNDERSTAND SIR, SEEKING HELP FROM YOU 
>>GUYS TO HELP OTHERS ISN'T A THOUGHT OF A BEAUTY 
>>ONLY...BEAUTY+BRAINS) here -- to prove what a 
>>hot-s--t one is or not (NOT TRYING TO PROVE 
>>ANYTHING..DO READ MY MAIL ONCE MORE) :-).
>>
>>New tricks? (TRICKS???THOUGHT I WAS STRAIGHT 
>>FORWARD) Indeed. You have shown how naive(WITH 
>>ALL DUE RESPECT SIR, INSPITE OF YOUR AGE YOU 
>>HAVE NO RIGHT TO USE "SUCH" WORDS AGAINST ME) 
>>you are about some of your assumptions 
>>(ASSUMPTIONS GET YOU STARTED WITH ANY PROBLEM), 
>>beliefs ( CAUSE I BELEIVE IN THEM) and 
>>expectations(TO BE ABLE TO ACHIEVE, I NEED TO 
>>EXPECT), from the few notes you posted here(FEW 
>>BUT SUBSTANTIAL). I won't go into details 
>>now(YOU ARE ALWAYS WELCOME IF YOU WANT TO), but 
>>if you would like for me to, I will be pleased 
>>to take them up for discussion at a later 
>>time.(WHY PRIVATE..IT STARTED IN A PUBLIC 
>>FORUM, KEEP IT THAT WAY)>
>>But that is nothing new (YOUR OPINION AGAIN 
>>SIR). You are not alone in your naivete (I 
>>WOULD BE GLAD IF YOU ARE NOT ONE OF MY KIND 
>>THAN). We have all been there(HAVE YOU??NOT 
>>REALLY OR ELSE YOU WON'T BE STILL A MEMBER OF 
>>THE FORUM). Again good news is that we can shed 
>>them(NO INTENSIONS OF SHEDDING MY QUALITIES). 
>>How? Yes, by talking(TALK AND TALK AND TALK SO 
>>THAT BY THE TIME I AM OF YOUR AGE, I WILL SHARE 
>>MY OPINION WITH A YOUNGER MEMBER IN THE EXACT 
>>SAME WAY AS YOU HAVE DONE). By
>>debating, discussing and deliberating and by 
>>paying attention(I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR 
>>PROLONGED DISCUSSIONS OR DEBATES).
>>
>>You may ask: But isn't that a waste of time? 
>>Aren't you guys just blowing air, accomplishing 
>>NOTHING? (THERE YOU GO..SEE YOU FINALLY KNOW ME 
>>BETTER)
>>
>>Well, it would be, IF that is ALL we do (YOU WOULD KNOW BETTER).
>>
>>See Momy, discussing and debating the issues we 
>>do, is NOT mutually exclusive of doing 
>>something concrete(WHICH I QUITE WELL 
>>UNDERSTOOD EVEN BEFORE YOU MENTIONED).
>>
>>
>>That is what you fail to recognize(MAYBE, THANK 
>>U FOR TAKING THE EFFORT TO MAKE ME REALISE). 
>>Again, no harm done. You have a lot of time to 
>>learn(I AGREE WITH YOU THERE).
>>
>>Many netters do many things--for their own 
>>betterment and for others' too. Not all talk of 
>>their actions or contributions. And besides, 
>>there is ALWAYS a whole lot more to the persona 
>>of these people than what their posts in 
>>assamnet may indicate. It will do you good to 
>>be aware of that(PLEASE MAKE ME AWARE OF WHAT 
>>YOU HAVE DONE SO FAR AS YOU CLAIM TO BE OLD 
>>..YOU HAVE HAD YOUR WHOLE LIFE AHEAD).
>>
>>What is important to recognize however, is that 
>>those who know better, or are expected to know 
>>better--people like yourselves, cannot and must 
>>not remain smug in your own righteousness, your 
>>self-image of a person of action, like you 
>>assert(WELL THAN POINT ME TOWARDS THE RIGHT 
>>DIRECTION, DONT ASK ME TO ARGUE, DEBATE AND 
>>DISCUSS). For if you do, you will be NO 
>>DIFFERENT from those who you perceive, albeit 
>>on scant and superficial evidence of assamnet 
>>posts, to be mere hot-air blowers, or having 
>>little to contribute towards what YOU consider 
>>meaningful. What is meaningful can come in 
>>many, many forms(JUST AN EXAMPLE FROM YOU IS 
>>WHAT I AM REQUESTING FOR..BESIDES I CLEARLY 
>>MENTIONED TWO CATEGORIES IN MY CONCLUDING 
>>LINE..PLEASE READ IT).
>>
>>Another thing  is that, we know, often a new 
>>member would leave in a huff, because netters' 
>>criticisms/comments  hurt their sense of what 
>>they hold dear(I BELEIVE IN MYSELF AND SOME 
>>INDIVIDUAL WHO IS VIRTUALLY KNOW TO ME JUST 
>>CANT HURT ME WITH WORDS..IT WILL TAKE YOU LOT 
>>MORE): Often myths associated with their 
>>realities or their beliefs (AGAIN FIRM 
>>BELEIEFS). And being unable or unwilling to 
>>articulate a defense of their own values and 
>>views, they would cite others' 'egos' or 
>>pro-this or anti-that or 
>>full-of-hot-air-ness(NOT ME...BUT YOUR MAIL 
>>COULD BE A CLASSIC EXAMPLE). This is the 
>>quintessential "Urohi-gosor-wrtw-onyo-korbat" 
>>syndrome(TAR MANE NUBUJILU). There is only one 
>>cure for it: SPEAK UP, defend what you 
>>believe(I ALWAYS DO CAUSE I HAVE NO FEAR OR 
>>SECOND THOUGHTS..I AM CONFIDENT AND ALWAYS 
>>SPEAK OF THINGS I CAN DEFEND IF NECESSARY). You 
>>will be surprised, that you CAN educate 
>>others(I KNOW THAT). And we will all be the 
>>better for it.
>>
>>Gave you an earful, didn't I :-)?(I CAN ABSORB 
>>MORE BUT DONT'T MAKE IT A HABBIT)
>>
>>Take care(U TOO), and whether you return to 
>>assamnet or not,(I WON'T AFTER TODAY) all the 
>>best to you and yours(AND TO YOU SIR).
>>
>>cm(MOMY)
>>
>>
>>
>>
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>>
>
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